


I Dreamed A Dream

by CrimsonFirebreeze



Series: Hiddles Diddles [1]
Category: Tom Hiddleston - Fandom
Genre: Dreamwalking, F/M, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-15
Updated: 2012-11-15
Packaged: 2017-11-22 16:19:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/611790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrimsonFirebreeze/pseuds/CrimsonFirebreeze
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tom wakes up with an unbearable aching in his chest and haunted by the warmth of a ghost he never knew. Prequel to A Chance Meeting.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Dreamed A Dream

**Author's Note:**

> So, I had this dream. I’m not even kidding. The dream sequence is a dream I actually had awhile back. I told my friend about it only recently to distract myself from an anxiety attack I was having and she told me I should make it into a story. A tragic, beautiful story. So I did. And I did this in only a couple hours. I feel accomplished. I hope you like it. I’ve had Bon Iver on repeat for the last three hours.
> 
> Also on my Tumblr

Sam smoothed the wrinkles in her gown that she’d caused by accident by balling the fabric in her fist out of pure nerves. She felt completely lost standing in the lobby of the swanky hotel they had stayed at. They? Yes, they. She knew she had been here with someone but… who? And where were they? No, not they. He. Definitely a man. She felt confused, dazed, and shook her head to clear the fog.

“There you are, darling,” he said, an elegant English accent sensually hugging every syllable. She’d know that voice anywhere. “I’ve been looking all over for you!”

“I thought you’d left me,” she replied automatically, though logic rebelled completely against the idea that she was ever with this man. But her body responded to him, heating as he pulled her close, pressing a soft, chaste kiss to her lips. The clean smell of his aftershave danced through her, sending a shiver down her spine. His own natural musk engulfed her as well and she melted instantly, submitting to his gently probing tongue. Oh how right it felt, giving herself over to that. Memories that she was sure didn’t belong to her flooded her mind. His laugh as he ducked a glob of frosting during a food fight, the sweet nothings he whispered to her under the stars, his passion as he heatedly made love to her. None of these things, or him, could belong to her. And yet here he was.

“Never, Kitten! I could never leave you,” he said, smiling that devil-may-care grin of his as he took her hand in his. “Why would you say such a silly thing? Come, we’re late to the premiere.”

She let him pull her along, admiring his lithe frame in that well-tailored suit. Admiring even more the thought of watching him peel it off later. It was right about then that the fog lifted and she was suddenly aware of things. She planted her feet and pulled her hand free of his.

“Wait! I can’t go with you. This is wrong.”

“What do you mean it’s wrong,” he asked, furrowing his brows.

“I don’t…” she hesitated a moment, not wanting to hurt him. “This is a dream.”

“Call it what you want, darling,” he sighed, reaching for her. “But we are still late.”

“No! I mean this isn’t the real world,” she said, pulling away from him. “It’s a dream. This. Us. It isn’t real. We’re dreaming.”

“Why would you say that,” he demanded, looking hurt. “You’re being ridiculous. You’re about to be my wife, for heaven’s sake. Are you getting cold feet, love?”

“No… I-“

“What then?”

“This isn’t real! Don’t you see, Tom? We’re dreaming. Out there in the real world-“

“This IS the real world,” he snapped, cutting her off and she could swear she saw Loki behind his eyes. “You’re really starting to scare me.”

“Thomas, would you please listen to me,” she said carefully. “In reality, when we both wake up, you wont know who I am. I wont even be a thought in your mind. We don’t know each other. We’ve never met.”

“That’s absurd.”

“That’s truth. We don’t know each other beyond this world. We live on opposite sides of the planet, come from two different social classes. You would not give me the time of day if you saw me in passing unless I asked for your autograph. I am nothing to you out there.”

“Have you…” he hesitated, licking his lips. “Have you stopped loving me? Is there someone else?”

She stared at him in disbelief. Why did she suddenly have such clarity while he lacked it? Why did she have to hurt him like this? The tears were already damming up in eyes in anticipation of the answer he didn’t want to hear. She reached up and caressed his cheek, hating that she had put him in this state.

“Never,” she said softly, meaning it with all her heart.

“Then why are you being so cruel,” he asked, barely above a whisper.

“I’m not, Dearheart,” she cooed. “I just don’t want you to be sad when you wake up and all you have left of me is a dull ache in your heart that you won’t understand. I don’t want that for you. I can’t stand the idea of you being in pain, my darling love.”

He took her face in his hands and quite suddenly claimed her lips in a heated kiss. She tried to push gently against him, but the trembling she felt under her hands stopped her. He was scared. She realized quickly that everything about this world was his. There was none of her own flair to their surroundings. She was in his world, his refuge that he created to get away from the daily grind of his life. It was all the things he loved, and nothing he didn’t and for some strange reason, she was  so deeply rooted in this with him with an entire lifetime of memories. And yet here she was stripping him of this safe haven in her own panic. She gave in, submitting completely to him. He was panting softly, breathless when he broke away.

“Stop talking like this,” he begged, his thumbs brushing her lips in what was likely an attempt to fix her smeared lipstick, if the red stains on his own mouth were any indication to the state of it. “Even if it was true, we’ve always been together and we will always be together. I won’t let anything keep you from me. I love you too damn much to live without you. I won’t do it.”

A million arguments sprang into her mouth, but died on her tongue as his desperate eyes pleaded with her. She gave him the best smile she could muster and nodded.

“Okay, Tom,” she conceded, smoothing out the lapels of his jacket, though they didn’t need it. “Whatever you say, honey. I’m just tired and letting my nerves get the best of me.”

He gave a relieved sigh as he pulled her into his arms. She snuggled against his chest, letting the sound of his heartbeat soothe her racing mind. All was right in his world again and for now that was what mattered. She knew the truth of it and maybe, it wouldn’t be as harsh a blow on him as it would inevitably be to her. She gave her own little sigh and savored the warmth of him around her. He was speaking to her, but she couldn’t hear him, his voice muffled in a growing rush, drowned out by the cries of a child. He was gone in a wisp of mist, slipping through her fingers as the pain of loss crushed the air from her lungs. She was being ripped away from him, violently, and she thought she would die if she couldn’t take a breath. Hot tears rolling down her cheeks were her only focus in the murky darkness as she managed to draw in a shaky breath, the icy air a salve on her shredded soul. Again the child cried out and she began the lonely struggle back to wakefulness.

~~~~~

Tom jerked awake suddenly, the sheets falling away from his naked chest as his fingers clutched at the heart beneath. What time was it? Where was he tonight? What the hell was this aching? He drew in a deep breath, willing himself to calm down and consulted his iPhone for the time. It was late and he sighed irritably, needing desperately to stay on top of getting enough sleep. The crisp air reminded him that he’d left the window open. He dragged himself out of bed and padded over to the offending hardware and closed it, shivering. Autumn in Iceland was beautiful and colder than he would like but still he enjoyed it.

A new wave of pain rolled through him, resonating from under the fingertips that still rubbed at his chest. He sincerely hoped he wasn’t having a heart attack. Surely he was far too young for that still? And he certainly hoped he was too healthy to be having one. His eyes slid over the starry sky beyond the window and with sudden clarity, he realized this was something he’d felt many times before. It was heartache and he shook his head as tears began pricking at his eyes. There was no reason in the world he could think of for his heart to be breaking and yet it was, so powerfully it was almost palpable under his hand. If he wanted, he was sure he could physically scoop out the shattered pieces of it.

But why? Why now? He searched the sky for answers as a tear escaped down his cheek. It was something, someone in a dream. A girl? Her face wasn’t clear and he strained in the silence of his hotel room to capture the sound of her voice, echoing just beyond his reach. It was frustratingly fruitless except for the one thing he could grasp: the gentle warmth of her lighting up every aspect of himself and for a moment, he felt intensely alive and in love. It felt good after so long and she was almost a clear image in his mind’s eye. He could taste her in the tingling of his lips, feeling the echo of her presence on his skin, breathe in a ghostly memory of her sweet scent.

“Kitten,” he gasped, not knowing from what deep well it came from, only that it felt right. Slowly, so slowly he could see her eyes clearer. Haunted eyes, full of ghosts but so intensely captivating, like the sea after a storm. 

And suddenly she was gone again, a vast chasm opening up inside him to suck the short-lived essence of her away from him. Again the pain rolled through him, forcing out a soft cry, the hot tears unnoticed until now. He was suddenly aware of how truly alone he was and the sorrow that feeling inspired threatened to overtake him completely, payment for a fleeting glimpse of the unknown siren that haunted his heart.

He took another deep breath, gathering himself. He tore himself away from the view of the sky and slid back into bed. For some reason he had an urge to listen to  ”I Can’t Make You Love Me” by Bon Iver. He closed his eyes, trying to relax and decided that soon, when it wasn’t attached to his personal turmoil, he’d have to make it his pick for Song of the Day on Twitter. Eventually, the ache in his heart subsided and he drifted off back into sleep.

Half the world away, his personal apparition was cradling a groggy toddler, fresh from her nap and blinking in the afternoon sunlight, close to her body, swallowing unshed tears and forcing a cheery demeanor she didn’t feel. The same waves crashed through her because unlike him, she could remember. She shook her head, pushing the dream from her mind. There was no way there was anything real about it. It would do her no good to start believing in silly things like astral projection and dream walking. Especially not when an actor like Tom Hiddleston was the subject. That would be silliness and an impossible possibility. She sighed, snuggling into the sweet baby smell of her daughter and banished the absurd thoughts from her mind, even though they were lovely. But no matter how loved and wanted and right she had felt in that world, it wasn’t real and never would be, no matter how many pretty stars she wished on. 


End file.
